Handling Disappointment

When my four-year-old granddaughter doesn’t get her way, she has a few different reactions to her disappointment; “But I want it, now!” or “Please grandma, please?” and with that, she gives me her pretty eyes, thinking that will help her cause.

As adults, while we may want to shout, “but I want it now!”, that is not a realistic way to handle disappointments.

Handling disappointment involves validating our emotions, acknowledging the pain and shifting our perspective to learn from the experience rather than dwelling on it. Life is full of disappointments. I’m sure you can think of many times in your own personal and work life where the “why me?” and having the victim mentality has come out.

The key is to not dwell on the why me and to not give up. Take the why and shift to what – what can I learn from this?

Understand that disappointment is temporary, and remember you are not alone and that everyone experiences setbacks.  Ask yourself, on a scale of 1-10, how important this situation will be in the long run?

We’ve all faced many challenging disappointments. Personally, I have found that seeking out support, adjusting my expectations and not giving up helps. If you make your expectations more flexible and realistic, disappointments and setbacks won’t stop you from trying again.

Helping my four-year-old granddaughter get through her disappointments in life — like why she can’t have cookies or candy for breakfast — has made me realize that life is life and disappointment is like a wave, it will peak and eventually pass.